Moving Junk!
Ahh Springs here, off come the long johns and two pairs of socks… it’s time to wash them any ways. This spring is a time for me to get it together for that long awaited joyous task of… Moving! Yuck… I hate moving!
While trying to get ready to move I took a look around and I was stunned to find a ton of… well stuff… AGAIN! After climbing over, around and through all this stuff for about a week… okay three weeks, I still couldn’t get it together to sort through all this stuff!
Moving… who in the hell invented that lovely chore anyway? Moving on, moving around, moving in, moving out, it doesn’t matter you’ve got to go through all your… stuff!
Finally I recruited my friend Gracie and while she was busy helping down stairs I got started in my closet… “What the…?”, if there was any dust balls in there I’d never know because I can’t see anything but… STUFF!
I got stuff in boxes, stuff in bags, stuff in milk crates, stuff hanging from nails, stuff on shelves, and stuff on the floor. I got stuff everywhere!
Some of this stuff must be junk… hmmm how can I tell what stuff is junk and what junk is stuff? Call in the recruit!
I had forgotten that there is a gender difference between identifying stuff and junk. Men see stuff and women see junk! Let a woman touch your stuff, it immediately turns to junk! But if she touches your junk it stays junk!
So anyways I decided to pull all my stuff out of the closet and go through it. Box after box, bag after bag, milk crate after milk crate, shelves stripped bare, and the floor can now be seen, but what’s this…? Dust balls! “Where’s the shop vac, I think it’s on the porch.” When I get to the porch I let out a gasp… “Oh my god… no way… there’s j-j-j-unk on my porch!” Boxes and bags of stuff turned into junk!
“MY GOD GRACIE… NOOOO!”
When Gracie had stepped in and started going through my stuff, it immediately turned into junk, and now that it’s junk I have to get rid of it!
Gracie just doesn’t get it! That stuff had value! Some of that stuff would have a practical use if there was an asteroid slamming into the earth, or a tornado, or a nuclear holocaust! She’d be crabby about not having stuff if one of those things happened you can be sure!
I can just hear her now, “Where’s your STUFF?” OHHHH NOWWWW its STUFF! Yeah… OK!”
Heh-heh, well after realizing that I would have had to find a way to move and store all that stuff somewhere else I came to the conclusion that I’m kind of sick of seeing all this stuff anyways, should have recruited Gracie a month ago I’d be done by now!
I find it very interesting that somehow all our stuff becomes invisible over time. We don’t even know it’s there until that day… that hideous day comes when you have to… MOVE STUFF!
Well now I have less stuff but more junk and instead of moving stuff now I have to move JUNK!
Can’t win!
~ Snarp