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[ezcol_1half]
There are a lot of things I can’t stand; I can’t stand while I'm laying down and I can’t stand while I'm sitting either! Hell most of the time I can't stand while I'm standing and I’m not kidding either ha-ha-ha!
If there’s one thing I really can’t stand though it’s the ‘I can't stand its’, you know people that say “I can't stand it anymore!”, well “IT” is a very vague word to use in that statement but I've learned never… ever to ask them what IT is that they can’t stand anymore! Yeah I soon found out that there’s a real big difference in just ‘venting’ than in ‘IT-ing’! It’s ok to let someone vent once in a while, we all do it, or should, but never let anyone ‘IT’ to you because you’ll go mad!
Hmm… I sense some confusion out there, ok to make it simple, venting is ok, ‘IT-ing’ is not! Venting is freeing up THEIR mind, ‘IT-ing” is freezing up YOUR brain!
Moving right along now, another thing I can’t stand; I can’t stand it when someone tells me something that takes my mind into places it should never be allowed to go! Yeah I know I do it to you all the time but this was bad… really bad!
This happened when I attended a rather odd event that they were calling the “Spank Fest 2013”! Umm… yeah… I kept my eyes closed as much as possible; I did not want to know what these people were going to be spanking! heh-heh-heh!
I figured out after a while that it was a going away party for my ole friend Sparky’s kidney! Oh yeah, he’s going to have a bad one taken out next week so we were toasting goodbye to a kidney! Can’t say I've ever been to a ‘Body Part’s Going Away Party’ before… no… no I have never been to one I'm sure!
[/ezcol_1half]
The oddity didn’t stop there of course; there was live entertainment, well there was a Scottish Jew named Ishismell who plays the bagpipes at Bar Mitzvah’s! He admitted to wearing lipstick under his kilt and I really wish he hadn’t shared that with us, you can’t even imagine where you're mind will go after hearing that! AAAAAHHHH!
I’m glad my cute little redhead friend showed up at the party, seeing her took my mind off all that because… well I really like cute little redheads!
All this was after a long day of working at… the “BATES MOTEL”! This place is already psycho enough but it was filled with old rude wrinkled up prune faced high and mighty stuck up Blue Hairs! I’m not kidding either! Complainers and whiners with their noses so high they could smell god’s ass! “My toilet’s plugged up”, “My door won’t unlock”, “My TV doesn’t work”, “My towel stinks”, on and on and on! “Quit wiping your ass with the towels lady!”
Bitches PALEEASE! AAAAAHHHH!
The front desk lady was losing her mind too and the manager was visualizing choking them but wouldn’t let me flip one off for calling me a “HOOLIGAN”!
ME… a hooligan?
So I spent the whole day surrounded by old rude complaining and whining Blue Hairs, only then to have my deep cavernous mind violated by a Scottish Jew bagpipe player with his lipstick under the kilt secret as I'm toasting goodbye to a kidney at a Spank Fest! AAAAAHHHH!
~Snarp