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[ezcol_1half]This may come to a shock to some of you but I am a confused individual right now and I am not kidding! I am baffled, puzzled, perplexed, befuddled, mystified, bewildered, uncertain, and disorientated, yeah I am confused! Why am I confused you ask?
Well that’s a confusing question isn’t it, and why would you even ask me why I'm confused thus confusing me even more? If I'm already confused that would mean that I'm unable to think or reason clearly or to act sensibly in any logical or sensible manner because I am… well I am confused and trying to figure out why I am confused is just too confusing!
I've come to realize that this world of yours cannot function without confused people and I may be upsetting the confused people balance by being in this confused state! Some of you would argue that I am always in a state of confusion, and I am, it’s called Confusedanism and its right next to Pennsylvania! Hahaha!
You see in your world as long as confused people are confused there is no confusion of the fact that they are confused, however if too many confused people were to become unconfused that would really upset the confusing people balance and your world would just start another war to get rid of the unconfused people to restore balance!
I mean even your history says your world was discovered by confusion; Columbus was confused because he thought he was landing in India! The natives were confused because they thought he was some kind of mentally challenged sea creature trying to change their little world which they have been just fine in for thousands of years!
In my little world there is no confusion and as long as I stay in it I'm fine, but I must have wandered across the border into your world[/ezcol_1half] just long enough to get confused which completely upset the confusion balance of MY world and yours!
Trying to unconfuse myself could take days, which is really confusing because it only takes a split second to get confused to begin with! Hmm… I'm going back across the border to fix my world so then I can look back into your world and reconfuse some people to help keep the confusing balance going and just maybe avert another war!
You're welcome!
To prepare myself I decided to watch a movie about Confusedus, or Confucius, because he was considered to be in his own little world too, but his world was kinda creepy! I mean he said he liked the music girls and that as he gazed it grows higher! Uhh… too much information! He also said that a man never shows what is in him unless it be in the morning. Well I see what WAS in me but then I flush it immediately! He did not sleep like a corpse, at home he unbent. Huh?
At sharp thunder, or a fierce wind, his look changed. Really? He did not eat moldy rice, bad fish, or anything that had a bad color or smelt bad. Does that mean that everyone else did? At the new moon he always put on dress and went to court! A cross dresser? Sneeze not into a woman’s breasts, else it becomes entangled in your eyebrows! Ok that one was mine hahaha!
Just because by the time you're done reading this article you’re confused too only means you're just doing your part and so am I!
You're welcomed again!
~Snarp