Reader

[wpcol_1half id="" class="" style=""]

I've always had short term memory problems and because of that I’m always late, and I mean always not just once in a while… always!  But because I have a short term memory problem I usually don’t remember why I'm late and when I finally arrive I'm always asked why I'm late and I can't answer truthfully because I don’t know why… because I forgot!

I'm not kidding either!

I get; “Why are you so late?”, “What took you so long?”, “Where have you been?” and the only truthful answer I can give is “Umm… I don’t know?”  Hmm… maybe it’s because Pluto takes 248 years to orbit the Sun so my timing is off!

I finally decided to ask myself some questions that may trigger my forgotten short term memory, like “What is the last thing you forgot to remember when you were trying to remember what the last thing you forgot was?”

Well if I could remember the last thing I forgot to remember then that would mean I didn't forget it after all, just forgot to remember it when I was supposed to right?  Hmm... but if I was supposed to remember to forget something and some time has passed by since I forgot to remember the last thing I forgot to remember to forget I guess I did forget to remember what I forgot to remember to forget after all![/wpcol_1half]

How depressing is that?

Then I started thinking that if someone was to use the phrase that they've forgotten more in a day than I've learned in a lifetime I’d have to ask them; “How do you know?  In order for that to be possible you'd have to keep forgetting everyday more than I've learned everyday!”

And since there's a very good chance that I may learn something new every day, you would have to lose more knowledge everyday than I've learned! How could you possibly know what I've learned if you keep forgetting it?

Sooner or later it'll be me learning more than you forgot because you wouldn't be able to remember if you already forgot what I may have already learned!  So just by making that statement to begin with would indicate to me that you don't remember forgetting that you've forgotten already more than I've learned and that I've already forgotten that I cared that you've forgotten more than I have learned!"

AND since I'm still alive my lifetime hasn't ended yet so I'm constantly learning new stuff for you to forget but you wouldn't know because you already forgot what I learned yesterday so how would you know that you didn't already forget what I just learned?

The only way that this statement could be true is if you are standing over my grave when you say it and were smarter than me!  But of course you would have forgotten more the day before than I learned in my lifetime so you wouldn't remember if you already forgot what I had learned in my lifetime and I'd be dead and really wouldn't give a rats ass that you have a memory problem that you don't remember having because you've forgotten everything that I've learned in my lifetime which included my knowledge of your memory problem!

So shut the hell up and get off my grave you freak!!!

~Snarp  www.snarpfarkle.com