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[ezcol_1half]

There was a “Back to the Future” marathon that seemed to last for a friggen month, but I still can’t help wondering why we are not as advanced as the people who made the movie back in 1985 thought we could be in 2015! Sure we are way more advanced than thirty years ago, but not advanced enough in my opinion, I want the damn flying cars that run off of free energy and that four second pizza hydrator!

Heck when the first “Back to the Future” movie was being filmed, the first Apple computer model was just being released and only cost about as much as a brand new car! Windows 1.0, (that’s one point oh), was in the works, and you could buy eggs, bacon, milk, bread, a book of stamps and fill up your gas tank all for about $30! A family of 4 could go to the movies for $11 where they would learn that 90% of all females had really BIG hair that you couldn’t see around, and every ten seconds we were blasted with Wendy’s “Where’s The Beef” commercials!

Now it’s thirty years later and I am asking… “Where’s The Damn Beef?” and I’m not talking about hamburgers, which are not made out of ham at all, I’m talking about where’s the beef in technology? Where are the hover boards, the fridge that comes down out of the ceiling, Holographic paper, self lacing shoes, and my favorites, the sleep inducing alpha rhythm generator and bionic implants!

At first I thought it would be cool to have the DeLorean time machine too, but when I gave it [/ezcol_1half] some real thought, I decided that the world is probably much better off if I don’t travel through time, especially the past! All it would take is for me to run into some assbag that did me wrong because I’m pretty sure that I would really a have hard time not wanting to screw with them in some way! I wouldn’t want to purposely cause them or anyone physical harm, well… okay maybe I would WANT to for some bully assbags I’ve known in the past, but instead I’d do something like follow them around and be sure to put things in their path to trip over every day for about six months! Then wait till they thought their clumsy bad luck streak was finally over and do it again, thus changing their bully assbag disposition into a clumsy assbag disposition by the time they got to me! Hahaha!

But of course this would probably cause a formation of an alternate timeline each time I went back to screw with this assbag and that would be bad… really bad! Well not for me, but let’s say I had to go back eleven times to accomplish my ‘bully-to-clumsy assbag disposition alteration’, and each time another alternate universe was created, that would mean there would be twelve timelines with twelve Snarp Farkles and I don’t think the world could handle that!

~Snarp
www.snarpfarkle.com